Lesson in Life from My 15-Year-Old Son

I would rather have interesting stories to tell when I’m 60 years old.

- Benjamin at 15 years old

I asked Benjamin, my fifteen year old son, why his school laptop was on the dining room table on a Sunday afternoon.  He said that a friend called him asking for help on a math assignment.  Benjamin quietly sighed and mumbled that he doesn’t understand people who are too focused on grades.  I suggested that some students have goals on which universities to attend or careers to pursue, so they work hard on their grades.  And that is when he said, I would rather have interesting stories to tell when I’m 60 years old.

I’m always pleasantly surprised when he comes home from a visit to his paternal grandfather’s house and genuinely enjoyed the stories about fighting in the Vietnam War, living in remote areas of Alaska, or learning about the new gun or knife that his grandfather added to his vast collection.  Benjamin is similarly entertained by my father’s stories about growing up as a rebellious teen in the Philippines in the 1960s and 1970s.  

On the other hand, I worry that his lack of intensity and focus on his future may leave him ill prepared to pursue a meaningful career and financially support a comfortable lifestyle.  I remind myself that he is only fifteen years old and thrives academically, even though he complains that he doesn’t like school.  I also remember that my brother had a similar laid back approach to life.  In many ways, I envied how my brother lived - nurturing his personal relationships, relishing the nightlife, and savoring the quiet parts of life - during his forty years of life.

My current career break has given me the slower pace to consider the next phase of my career and life.  What stories do I have to tell now?  What stories do I want to tell ten years from now?